light of the mind

I hope all of you have been well. Life has been somewhat busy on my end but I've been doing alright overall. Just still a-lot to process and think about.

A-little over a week ago now I think was when Mike and I adopted Fynn, my fathers dog. He also belonged to my mom and nephew but it was mainly my dad who cared for him and worked with him the most. So that has been an adjustment - not too bad but still a change. He and Wiley get along well, sometimes they do rough it up a bit more than I would care for but other than that it's been nice having him here and helping care for him. We need to get him to do his doggy business outside - that seems to be the biggest issue. Sometimes he does and we give him treats when that happens. He is a cairan terrier. The same breed as toto from the 'wizard of oz' (fun fact I know!).

I finished one grief book and I've been reading another. The first one ("Survival Guide: Navigating the holidays after loss") was somewhat religious. Which isn't bad but it's hard for me to get into and understand. I think most of you know from some past posts - I am agnostic. So I do believe in a higher power but I don't know if it is God. But the book was helpful and had some good ideas on what to do mainly during thanksgiving and christmas. It had lists and things to fill out if I needed to.
The second book I am about 100 pages away from finishing ("It's okay that you're not okay" by Megan Devine). It's been pretty good, too. Very raw and realistic. The author lost her husband due to a drowning accident. At times I've had to put the book down because it was just so sad to read. But I do enjoy it, it covers the emotions and thought process behind loss quite well.

I did find out that my mom picked me as her Power of attorney. It feels like a-lot but I just need to learn my roles and responsibilities so I can better understand this. Do any of you have any experience with this?

I'm pretty much done christmas shopping. I hardly did any this year and that was fine. Each year there is always so much pressure on christmas and gift giving. This year I'm just giving to one of my best friends, her mother and grandmother, Mike and his family is doing a christams gift exchange this year. So with that I got his one brother. Also there is a gift exchange at work where we all trade gifts with each other. It's new, the cost was under $5 for each person. I ended up getting small bottles of lotion and some hard candy and candy canes in these little christams bags.

Yesterday was my 38th birthday. It honestly didn't feel all that different. But I think that will be the norm for the next couple of years. I worked in the morning and when I came home from work Mike and I got dairy queen and watched an old christmas movie that I loved as a kid. It's called 'Annabelle's wish' if any of you have heard of it - let me know! It wasn't as bad as I was worried it might be. Also Mike made brownies and I read the rest of the evening. It was calm and quite which was what I wanted.

So I guess that is it for now... it's just been hard to get back on here and write and read. But I hope you all have been well. I think about this site often. <3